Understanding Suicidal Crisis Through a Trauma Lens

Table of Contents

• What Drives Suicidal Crisis?
• Helping People Stay Safe During a Suicidal Crisis
• Understanding Suicidal Thoughts as a Coping Mechanism
• The Role of Relationships in Healing
• FAQs

Suicide isn’t a feeling. It’s a thought process driven by unmanageable emotional distress. As a DBT therapist, I often describe suicidal ideation as the brain’s way of saying “Stop… this is too much.”

What Drives Suicidal Crisis?

• Early attachment patterns
• Unmet emotional needs in childhood
• Disrupted sense of self from relationships
• Maladaptive coping strategies (e.g, self-harm, substance use, food restriction)

When people grow up without the skills to understand or regulate their emotions, it affects every area of life including relationships, self-esteem, and emotional resilience.

Every day, 17 people in the UK die by suicide. Of these, only five are known to mental health services, and just one is often flagged as high risk. These stark figures underscore what many clinicians already know: our current suicide prevention strategies, rooted in prediction and risk assessment, are not enough. This blog offers a trauma-informed, relationship-based lens for understanding and supporting someone in suicidal crisis.

“The suicidal person in invisible agony reaches a certain unendurable level… it’s not desiring the fall; it’s terror of the flames.”
— David Foster Wallace, The Burning Building of the Mind

Helping People Stay Safe During a Suicidal Crisis

When someone is in a suicidal crisis, what they often need most is to feel seen, heard, and understood. Rather than immediately focusing on risk or prediction, we can help by focusing on their pain, their story, and their needs in the moment.

Safety isn’t just about preventing harm, it’s about building emotional safety through:

• Compassionate listening
• Validation of feelings
• Encouraging hope and choice
• Supporting autonomy and connection

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) helps individuals develop crucial emotional and interpersonal skills:

• Distress Tolerance
• Emotion Regulation
• Interpersonal Effectiveness
• Mindfulness

These tools empower individuals to manage overwhelming feelings and stay safe during periods of crisis.

Understanding Suicidal Thoughts as a Coping Mechanism

Suicidal thoughts may reduce distress temporarily. They can become a way to escape internal pain. Supporting someone means recognising this and gently guiding them towards other ways of coping.

People often feel shame or guilt about having suicidal thoughts. A trauma-informed approach acknowledges that these thoughts are responses to pain, not character flaws. Through consistent support and skill-building, many individuals can experience real change and hope.

The Role of Relationships in Healing

A trusting therapeutic relationship provides a secure space for clients to explore what they’re feeling without fear of judgement. This kind of relationship is key to fostering safety and long-term resilience.

Working with suicidal crisis means working with distress, not just danger. Suicidal ideation is rarely about wanting to die, it’s about not wanting to feel the pain anymore. Supporting someone in suicidal crisis means teaching them skills to soothe, regulate, and eventually rebuild. We can’t always stop the thoughts from coming, but we can help build the strength and support to survive them.

If you’re looking for support in navigating suicidal thoughts or emotional distress, I offer trauma-informed, DBT-informed therapy in Guildford, Surrey.

Please get in touch to talk about how we can work together.

FAQS

How do I support someone in staying safe from suicide?

Support them by creating a non-judgemental, emotionally validating environment. Ask about their distress, not just their risk. Help them identify what soothes and what triggers them. Encourage professional help from trauma-informed therapists who offer DBT or similar models.

What is the role of DBT in suicidal crisis support?

DBT teaches essential life skills that many people in distress were never given: how to tolerate pain without making it worse, how to identify and regulate emotions, and how to build healthy relationships. It’s evidence-based for people who experience chronic suicidal ideation, self-harm, and emotional dysregulation.