Borderline Personality Disorder Therapy: Understanding, Causes & Treatment in Guildford, Surrey

Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), also known as Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder (EUPD), is a complex mental health condition that deeply impacts how a person relates to themselves and others. If you’re searching for borderline personality disorder therapy in Guildford or the wider Surrey area, you’re not alone and effective, compassionate help is available.

What Is Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)?

Borderline Personality Disorder is recognised in the DSM-5 as a serious and persistent mental illness, marked by instability in emotions, self-image, relationships, and behaviour. For a formal diagnosis, an individual must meet at least five out of nine specific criteria, which must be pervasive and long-standing, impacting multiple areas of life.

A full diagnosis should only be made by a qualified mental health professional using structured tools, such as the Structured Clinical Interview (SCID) over the course of 6-8 hours taking in to account full psychological, personal and family history. Unfortunately, in many NHS settings, individuals are often given a “working diagnosis” when they first present usually after a 30 minute consultation which can be harmful.

Common Diagnostic Features Include:

• Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment
• A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterised by alternating between extremes of idealisation and devaluation
• Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self
• Impulsivity in at least two potentially self-damaging areas i.e. spending, sex, substance misuse, reckless driving, binge eating, purging
• Recurrent suicidal behaviour, gestures or threats or self-harm
• Affective instability due to marked reactivity of mood (i.e. intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or anxiety usually lasting a few hours and rarely more than a few days)
• Chronic feelings of emptiness
• Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger
• Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms.

With that all being said if an individual grew up in an invalidating environment all of the above would be a naturally occurring as creative adaptation. If children grow up without an adult to teach them how to be in relationship, to regulate emotions, to navigate distress then the child wont learn this and will struggle with all of the above.

What Causes BPD?

I always describe to my clients that it is a result of 100% nature and nuture in the development of these difficulties. At our Guildford therapy clinic, we explain BPD as a condition caused by both nature and nurture. It’s not simply a brain disorder, it’s a response to early emotional trauma. Unfortunately social media and the press don’t provide accurate information and often vilify those who struggle.

More than 80% of individuals who meet the criteria for BPD report a history of:

• Childhood emotional neglect

• Physical or sexual abuse

• Invalidating family environments

What Is the Best Therapy for Borderline Personality Disorder?

If you are looking for borderline personality disorder therapy in Surrey, the good news is that effective, evidence-based treatments exist. We offer psychological support in Guildford, with a strong focus on relational and trauma-informed care.

The best treatment is for DBT is psychological therapy. There are different opinions as to what ‘type’ of therapy is best suited and I share with clients that there are far more commonalities in all the types of therapies than there are differences so its not about do X therapy for X problem and Y therapy for Y problem.

Within my NHS work I notice that clients experience rejection from other modalities of therapy.  Behaviours that individuals engage to self-soothe and cope, such as self-harm and suicide attempts, mean that therapists in private practice struggles to see them safely because they are not part of a wider team. Therefore, my first recommendation is stabilisation work such as DBT. It has a proven track record to help individuals even with the most severe forms of shame which leads to self-destructive behaviours. Once this has happened individuals can then move more towards psychotherapy.

Therapeutic Approaches That Help

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT)

DBT is widely recommended for BPD and helps clients:

• Build emotional regulation skills

• Manage distressing thoughts and urges

• Improve interpersonal effectiveness

• Reduce self-destructive behaviours

Many clients benefit from DBT in the early stabilisation phase, before transitioning into long-term psychotherapy.

Psychodynamic & Integrative Psychotherapy

Once stability is achieved, deeper therapeutic work can focus on:

• Identity formation

• Attachment wounds

• Childhood trauma

• Shame and self-worth issues

The most important factor? The therapeutic relationship itself. A therapist who understands trauma, stays regulated, and provides consistency can help shift relational patterns that fuel distress.

If you feel you have been rejected by previous therapists or feel “too much,” help is still available.

Does Medication Help?

Medication can help but is limited in effect. While there is no medication which is recommended to treat BPD directly, many individuals benefit from medications targeting symptoms like:

• Depression

• Anxiety

• Sleep disturbances

SSRIs and SNRIs can be helpful, but they should be used in combination with psychological therapy.

How We Help Individuals with BPD

We specialise in borderline personality disorder therapy that is:

• Evidence-based (DBT, psychodynamic, trauma-informed)

• Compassionate and non-judgemental

• Focused on long-term healing, not short-term fixes

• Run by clinicians with experience in NHS and private practice

We work with individuals from across Surrey and Hampshire, offering in-person and online sessions. If you’re seeking therapy for BPD, we’re here to support you, wherever you are in your healing journey.

If you’re looking for borderline personality disorder therapy in Surrey, contact us today to book an initial consultation.

FAQS

What type of therapy works best for Borderline Personality Disorder?

Dialectical Behaviour Therapy (DBT) is one of the most effective approaches, especially for emotional regulation and self-harming behaviours. Long-term psychotherapy can also help address the underlying trauma.

Can I recover from BPD with therapy?

Yes. With the right therapist and a consistent therapeutic relationship, individuals with BPD can recover, build emotional resilience, and lead fulfilling lives.

How do I know if I need therapy for Borderline Personality Disorder?

If you experience intense emotional reactions, unstable relationships, identity struggles, or self-harming behaviours and these patterns persist across time therapy could be a crucial step toward healing.