ADHD Support: Practical Strategies for Managing Memory, Tasks and Relationships

One of the lesser-known but hugely impactful challenges of ADHD is something called object permanence. Traditionally, this term comes from child development psychology, when babies begin to understand that something still exists even when they can’t see it. For adults with ADHD, object permanence takes on a different meaning: if something isn’t right in front of us, it can feel like it doesn’t exist at all.

Everyday Challenges Adults Face with ADHD

For someone with ADHD, difficulties with object permanence might show up as:

• Forgetting about tasks, bills or emails once they’re out of sight
• Struggling to maintain relationships when regular contact isn’t happening
• Losing track of important items unless they’re visible
• Feeling like goals and long-term projects vanish without constant reminders

This isn’t laziness or a lack of caring. It’s rooted in the executive function differences of the ADHD brain.

The Neuroscience Behind ADHD and Memory

ADHD involves differences in how the prefrontal cortex and dopamine networks function. These areas manage working memory – the ability to hold information in mind and act on it. When dopamine signalling is lower or inconsistent, it’s harder to keep track of what isn’t visible or immediately rewarding.

So, that whatsapp reply you meant to send? It drops out of mind the moment it leaves your visual field. That friend you love but don’t see often? They feel distant, not because you don’t care, but because your brain struggles to keep the connection “active” without cues.

Why ADHD Support Is Essential for Daily Life

Object permanence challenges can cause shame (“Why do I keep forgetting?”), conflict in relationships (“You never call me back”), and frustration at work (“I can’t seem to follow through”).

Left unaddressed, it chips away at self-esteem and increases stress. This is made more complicated by our increasing use of smart phones which enable us to seemingly be able to do multiple things at the same time. It might feel handy but flicking between tasks or even just seeing a message pop up on your smart watch in the middle of a meeting will intensify object permanance difficulties because you then have to remember to reply.

How Our New Me & ADHD Programme Can Help

Our new Me & ADHD programme tackles these challenges head-on by helping you:

• Understand the brain science behind object permanence, reducing shame and self-blame
• Learn strategies to “externalise memory” with visual cues, reminders, and supportive systems
• Strengthen working memory skills through practical exercises
• Develop communication tools for explaining ADHD challenges to friends, family, and colleagues
• Build routines and structures that work with your ADHD brain instead of against it

Key Takeaways: Effective ADHD Support for Adults

If you’ve ever felt like “out of sight, out of mind” rules your life, you’re not alone and it’s not a personal failing. It’s how the ADHD brain is wired. With the right strategies and support, you can reduce the impact of object permanence difficulties and feel more in control of your time, relationships, and wellbeing.

FAQS

How can I manage memory and task challenges with ADHD?

Memory and task difficulties are common in ADHD due to executive function differences. Using visual reminders, planning tools, structured routines and external systems can help keep tasks and responsibilities visible and manageable.

Where can I find resources or programmes for ADHD support?

Adults seeking ADHD support can explore expert advice from magazines like Additude or structured programmes that focus on practical strategies for daily life, communication and memory management. Find out more about our Me & ADHD programme here.